Stuck in a moment...

... and you can't get out of it.

That's the song that was singing in my head for the past week Irf. Ok... let me also tell you now that I'm pissed off. I wrote a beautiful blog. And I didn't save it. And it vanished. This is happening to me for the umpteenth time and I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But I don't learn from it either.

I'm having a rough time at work. I love what I do. But I don't like man management. Just ask me to sit and conceptualise and write and I'll be the happiest. Ask me to tackle fragile 'creative' egos and I want to scurry away like a squirrel and peep out under an elm. I'm tired of warding off all the vultures waiting to peck at me like eager birds of prey (that's how I visualise them). I'm not a messiah, or Moses or Noah. The seas don't part for me, instead the tablets with the commandments seem to be getting heavier and I'm teetering and tottering and wilting under the pressure of being sought after as 'The Problem Solver'. I'm not. I'm me.

Right now however, I'm a traffic cop, a police commissioner, a town planner and a civil engineer all rolled into one. And my nerves are on edge and am so frazzled it ain't funny. All I sit and do is cry. And can I show ma my weak self? How often can I turn to friends for help? Ultimately one is alone isn't it? I want out. But then that is not a solution. I'm not a quitter, but I don't want to handle so much pressure. The sheer force per lb. of body mass is killing me. I only know my Sai is my Moses and He will (as always) show me the way.

This is my moment and I'm stuck in it. Like Bono croons,
"The water is warm till you discover how deep
I wasn’t jumping, for me it was a fall
It’s a long way down to nothing at all"

I'm hoping of course (being the eternal Hoper that I foolishly am) that eventually,
"And if our way should falter
Along the stony pass
It’s just a moment
This time will pass"

Don't get stuck in a moment Irf. Just keep walking. Yes Johnnie Walker :), keep walking. Do you have a choice?

And hey, if you're enjoying my blogs so much the least you can do mister is leave a decent comment. Don't I warn you, don't don't don't...

Yup...don't get stuck in a moment! (Unless it's an orgasmic, breathless, dreamy, unbelievably brilliant, unfathomably blissful and unexplainable, life altering moment. If yes, then pray that the moment is 'stuck' forever).

Life is full of choices ain't it? Yes or no?...:) Make yours today.